Beef Supreme – EP
Release Date: 2012
Highlights: none
I’ve heard some pretty ridiculous band names in my time. Raging Slab. Rhino Bucket. Killer Dwarves. All pretty ridiculous right? They all have ridiculous names but they are great bands with great songs. So what’s the problem with getting some music from a band called Beef Supreme? Well, this wouldn’t be a problem at all if the songs weren’t equally as bad as the name and their cute little shtick. Luckily this was only a four song EP because it took all I had to make it through this platter of boredom.
Beef Supreme is a self proclaimed “stoner rock” band from the Southwest that consists of guitarist and vocalist Niki Bel Grande, drummer Lou Chalupa, and bassist Macho Grande. Cute. I see what you did there with your clever combining of “stoner rock” and “stoner food.” According to their bio, Beef Supreme also “has crafted a sound that is unique among metal bands today.” Well, based on the four songs I just sat through, Beef Supreme does little to stand out whatsoever other than the fact that they are one of the least good bands I’ve heard. It’s hard to literally be “unique to metal bands today” when you have already categorized yourself into one of the most played out sub genre names of the past decade.
Here’s the honest truth here. Beef Supreme as musicians really don’t suck. They can play their respective instruments pretty well and the EP was really well produced. Mistake #2. If you’re going to proclaim yourself as “stoner rock”, at least try and not make it sound like an over produced Avenged Sevenfold album. The fact that these cats can play really doesn’t make up for the fact that they really have no good songs. The songs are totally generic to the genre and completely forgettable. So forgettable in fact that the EP had finished playing for about 10 minutes before I realized it was over.
I’m sure Beef Supreme will appeal to someone but I’m just not sure who. If anything, they may appeal to people who don’t like real metal. In the same way that bands like Avenged Sevenfold and Korn call themselves “metal” and appeal to that mallrat crowd, I feel that Beef Supreme will have this same appeal to those kids. These kids will listen to Beef Supreme and boast that they love “stoner rock.” Then they’ll discover Kyuss, Captain Beyond, and Corrosion of Conformity and realize that Beef Supreme is just a mediocre band riding the coattails of a played out shtick.
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