The Album By Album Challenge: Poison

poison-logoWelcome to another “Album by Album Challenge.” For those that are new here, the “Album by Album Challenge” is where I take a band’s entire discography and listen to every album in order of release from front to back. With my unforgiving and well-aged ear, I call it how I hear it. In some cases, I find that what I once thought was good is actually pretty crappy and sometimes crap manages to age into something pretty kick ass. And in some cases, face melting is still just good ol’ face melting.

This time around I decided I just needed to dumb down a little bit and just have some senseless, no frills fun. To do this, I decided to visit the Poison discography. Poison was one of my favorite bands from back in the day and they always were a good, fun listen. I couldn’t tell you the last time I sat and listened to a Poison album straight through so I thought this would be a fun one. Hell, there were even two albums that they put out (the last two) that I never even heard so I was really looking forward to this one. So how would Poison’s albums hold up after all these years? Read on and we’ll find out.

Look What the Cat Dragged In
Release Date: August 2, 1986
The Good: Cry Tough, I Want Action, I Won’t Forget You, Play Dirty, Look What the Cat Dragged In, Talk Dirty To Me, Want Some Need Some, Blame It On You,
The Bad:
The Indifferent:

Ok. So right off the bat I can tell you this right now. Look What The Cat Dragged In has not aged well at all. It sounds so dated and flat but yet there’s this almost kind of timeless quality to it. I can vividly remember when this album came out and I loved the fuck out of this album. I must have played it front to back 5 times the day I brought it home from Warehouse Records & Tapes (yeah brah!). 28 years later I can pretty much sum up this album with one word: Fun. Much like KISS, these guys weren’t out to break new ground or pique your intelligence. With songs like “I Won’t Forget You”, “Talk Dirty To Me”, and “I Want Action” Poison set out to basically be the soundtrack to getting laid, getting drunk, and just being young.

I am however surprised to be reminded that the best part of this album really lies in the later half of the album where Poison flexes their Cheap Trick and Hanoi Rocks influences on songs like “Want Some, Need Some”, “Blame It On You” and even with “#1Bad Boy” Poison does a better Motley Crue (ala Too Fast For Love) than Motley Crue ever did. “Let Me Go To The Show” is KISS all the way with almost a little bit of punk attitude in the mix and a great way to close out this album. I’m, telling you, even as corny and cheesy as this album, Poison’s hear was in the right place and delivered the soundtrack to a million Friday night parties all over the world. Its greatness was forgotten by me and it’s kind of fun to relive it as a 40 year old fuck remembering the old days. Sometimes it’s just nice to listen to some fun, upbeat music that doesn’t make you think. Poison’s music was pretty much made for people who think with their crotches anyways so this was a really fun and easy album to sink into. Too bad it’s just so poorly produced.

=============================================

Open Up and Say…Ahh!
Release Date: May 21, 1988
The Good: Love on the Rocks, Nothin’ But A Good Time, Good Love, Tearing Down the Walls, Love on the Rocks, Look But You Can’t Touch, Fallen Angel, Every Rose Has It’s Thorn, Your Mama Don’t Dance, Bad To Be Good,
The Bad:
The Indifferent:

This album sounds light-years better than its predecessor. The production on this one is still a bit dated sounding but it has so much more depth to it that it makes for an overall better listen. The other thing is that you can totally tell that as this point Poison was a well-oiled machine having spent nearly 2 years on the road supporting the first album. They sound like better players on this album but the element of brainless fun is still there. “Love on the Rocks” is a great opening song with a really thick sounding riff that right out the gates sets a great tone. “Every Rose Has It’s’ Thorn” reminds me of my first girlfriend back in the day and how I’d listen to this song over and over again knowing I would be moving soon. Call it corny but this is what a great song does. It plays a part in your life, makes a connection with you, and through nostalgia you relive that feeling every time you hear it. All of these songs are big parts of my youth and they really do bring back a lot of fun, unforgettable memories.

Lyrically there is ZERO growth here but that’s fine. I mean, again, Poison at this point has let us know that they like the finer things in life. Sex, having a good time, and well just fucking going shit crazy and having a wild ass party. One might say, “But Don, these songs are so stupid.” Yeah? Well, if I wanted to expand my intelligence I’d listen to Dream Theater or Rush or Yes but if I wanna get shit faced and just bust some shit up (or maybe just clean my office, do laundry, and run errands), Poison is the perfect fun soundtrack for all that. Song for song “Open Up and Say Ah” is a classic. This is the album where Poison really defined themselves as their own band and as a band that would be emulated and imitated by many. This was a really fun listen and boy talk about a walk down memory lane for me. Even their cover of the Loggins & Messina classic “Your Mama Don’t Dance” was a blast and really captured the essence of that silly ass band. Can we also talk about the song “Bad To Be Good”? How did that song never become a classic? That song is probably the best song on that album and I don’t think they ever played that one live. OH well, either way, this album was nothin’ but a good time indeed.

=============================================

Flesh & Blood
Release Date: June 21, 1990
The Good: Valley of Lost Souls, Unskinny Bop, Let It Play, Ride the Wind, Something To Believe In, Life Loves a Tragedy,
The Bad: Flesh & Blood Sacrifice, Don’t Give Up an Inch, Poor Boy Blues
The Indifferent: Swamp Juice (Soul-O), Life Goes On, Come Hell or High Water, Ball and Chain,

First off, I will never understand how “Valley of Lost Souls” which is easily one of Poison’s best songs was NEVER played live. I really thought that on the Flesh & Blood that they should’ve made this the opener but instead they just played that “intro” and then went into long time opener “Look What the Cat Dragged In.” Oh well, aside from that, this album really opens with a fucking bang but then quickly takes a dive with the title track. I hated that song back in the day and I hate it even more now. It’s just not a good song. “Unskinny Bop” is one of the funniest songs ever and being a guy who appreciates women of substance (big girls) I can get behind this one. It’s also Poison going back to that kitschy, brainless fun.

“Ride the Wind” holds up really well and has one of the best hooks/choruses of the genre while “Something to Believe In” also shines. This is such a great song and proved the Bret Michaels could actually write a decent song not about putting a flesh tattoo into some broad. “Life Loves a Tragedy” is also one of those great Poison songs that should’ve been given more attention as it’s a really great song. “Poor Boy Blues” is a great example of why a band like Poison should NEVER play the blues. As a whole Flesh & Blood is a really weak album. The good songs on this album are great but for the most part the songs all just sound rushed and it just sounds like they were running out of clever ideas. I mean, you can only sing about fucking chicks so many times before it just starts to get ridiculous. They tried to be a bit more “grown up” about the subject matter but it still just came across as trying way too hard.

=============================================

Native Tongue
Release Date: February 9, 1993
The Good: The Scream, Stand, Stay Alive, Until You Suffer Some, Bring it Home, Body Talk, 7 Days Over You, Theater of My Soul, Strike Up The Band, Ride Child Ride, Blind Faith,
The Bad:
The Indifferent: Aint That The Truth, Bastard Son of a Thousand Blues

Coming off the heels of a very long tour behind Flesh & Blood, trouble was brewing in the Poison camp. It turned out CC Deville was pretty much snorting up all of Peru and couldn’t even keep it together enough to play. When you can’t even keep it together enough to play Poison songs you must REALLY be fucked up. Out goes CC and in comes Shrapnel shred kids Ritchie Kotzen. This move had me scratching my head but the end result was an absolutely fantastic record with Native Tongue. Having Kotzen in the band really kicked things up a notch and even the songwriting showed some significant growth and maturity. Songs like “The Scream”, “Stand”, and “Stay Alive” showed a much more mature side of Poison and had them really sounding like (gasp) a great band! “Until You Suffer Some “just may be the greatest ballad of the genre in that time along with “Theater of My Soul.” Even with a more mature, grown up sound and writing style, songs like “Strike Up The Band”, “Ride Child Ride”, and “Blind Faith” still held a glimpse of that fun Poison without possessing the mentality of a horny 14 year old boy.

Having Kotzen in the band, in my opinion was much like when Motley Crue had John Corabi in the band. Kotzen really kicked things up a notch and just by listening to this album you hear a band that is being pushed to really work hard. Poison has never been a band known for being great (or even good) musicians but the over all musicianship is really great on this album. It’s a shame that this wasn’t to be as I really feel that this could’ve take Poison in some really cool directions. In the end, much like Motley Crue, Poison chose to be a band that would forever be identified by the juvenile material of their past. More power to them but in all honesty, I’d take Native Tongue over anything they ever did.

=============================================

Crack a Smile…and More!
Release Date: March 14, 2000
The Good: Best Thing You Ever Had,
The Bad: Shut Up and Make Love, Baby Gets Around A Bit, Cover of the Rolling Stone, Be The One, Mr. Smiley, Sexual Thing, Lay Your Body Down, No Ring, No Gets, That’s The Way I Like It, Tragically Unhip, Doin’ As I Seen on my TV
The Indifferent:

Words just cannot express how bad this album is. It’s really sad to be honest because it’s like they didn’t even try. They had just put out their best album (and in my opinion one of the best of the genre), they can Kotzen for shagging Rikki Rockett’s wife, and then they replace him with ANOTHER Shrapnel guitar shredder named Blues Saraceno. Now Blues is a great guitar player and in a lot of ways was a much better fit for Poison’s more tongue in cheek nothin’ but a good time put my flesh tattoo inside of you kinda shit. His image was a lot more fun but he still had the chops to take Poison in a bold direction. Instead of going into that bold new direction, Bret & Co. decided that they’d rather be horny 14 year olds again but in all honesty, at this point it just looks and sounds absolutely retarded.

There isn’t a good song in the mix. It’s kind of sad when there are songs here that make the material from Look What the Cat Dragged In sound mature. “Shut Up and Make Love”? “Baby Gets Around a Bit”? “No Ring, No Gets?” Gag me with a BC Rich. These songs are terrible and not to mention Bret Michaels singing these songs in his new adopted “southern twang” voice just took things to a whole new level of suck. Avoid this album at all costs. Not even their cover of the classic “Cover of the Rolling Stone” could save this sinking ship. Poor Blues Saraceno. How did anyone ever let him live this one down?

=============================================

Hollyweird
Release Date: May 21, 2012
The Good:
The Bad: Hollyweird, Squeeze Box, Shooting Star, Wishful Thinking, Get Ya Some, Emperor’s New Clothes, Devil Woman, Wasteland, Livin’ In the Now, Stupid Stoned and Dumb, the whole fucking thing sucks.
The Indifferent:

So CC Deville returns and Poison hits the studio to make an album called Hollyweird. Hollyweird is a great example of a band that is tapped completely out of ideas. The well is dry. There’s nothing in the reserves. These guys were grasping at straws and it totally shows. The songwriting is not clever at all (no matter how hard they try). They managed to completely rape and pillage the Who classic “Squeeze Box” and also prove once and for all that all this time has not made them any better musicians or players. It’s really sad. I mean, we all know Poison was never known to be great musicians or even songwriters but c’mon, this stuff isn’t even fun. Bret’s vocals are off key and again, that fake southern twang? The drumming is so off time and sloppy and why is Bobby Dall even in a band? That guy makes Cliff Williams (AC/DC bassisit) look like Jaco Pastorius. It’s kind of sad when CC Deville is actually the MVP. Yeah, exactly.

Poison was a really fun band in the beginning and they even showed signs of growing and potentially growing as players. They peeked with Native Tongue but from there just took a nose dive into the oceans of suck. To say that this album is even mediocre would be way too much of a compliment. These guys still put on a great, fun live show and it’s no surprise after hearing this coaster that Poison heavily relies on the nostalgia of playing nothing but their old “hits.” I mean, there is ZERO effort to this album and I can only hope, for the sake of the world, that Poison is done trying to be a relevant band.

=============================================

About The Author

Discover more from Southeast of Heaven

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading