Pleased To Meet You, Alice Cooper

alicecooperWhat can be said about Alice Cooper that hasn’t already been said a million times? Before there was Marilyn Manson, Slipknot, Gwar, or even KISS, Alice Cooper was out there making a connection to the discarded, confused, and the outcast youth. Alice Cooper is so much more than the general public will ever know him to be. To the general public back then he was a public enemy. Today he’s a classic rock icon but Alice’s diehard fans know that there is so much more to him that that. To his fans, Alice is more than just the soundtrack of our lives. Alice is an integral part of their lives.

My connection with Alice Cooper goes back to 1986 when I was 12 years old. I can remember hearing some of Alice’s already classic songs on the radio. I would hear “School’s Out”, “Billion Dollar Babies”, “Under My Wheels” and I thought they were fucking killer songs. I didn’t know much about Alice Cooper and since this was long, long before the internet and YouTube, I had to go ask someone who would know more. I went to my dad to ask him about it. My dad was not really a rock n’ roller. My dad was a total old school folkie. He loved folk music and Americana music but I figured he’d know who Alice Cooper was since he was old and my dad was old. When I asked my dad, I can remember him just smiling and saying, “Donald, Alice Cooper was a freak! He put on crazy live shows with snakes and all kinds of props but he had some good songs.” I was shocked that my dad knew all this.

One evening in the middle of summer break, my dad came home from work and says, “Donald, I bought this for you. Let’s put it on.” What was it you ask? It was a copy of Alice Cooper’s Greatest Hits. I can still remember it as plain as day. I was 12 years old and we sat in my room and put on this record. “I’m Eighteen” blasted through the speakers and I just remember feeling so moved by it. It wasn’t WASP, it wasn’t Motley Crue, and it wasn’t Iron Maiden but it was heavy in its own way. My dad didn’t really have to explain to me just how crazy this kind of music sounded in the early 70’s; a time where music was so homogenized, safe, and fluffy. Alice was the dirty reality of life that his peers just seemed to sugar coat and glaze over like it wasn’t really happening. This was some pretty heavy shit for a 12 year old to be told by his dad. Yeah, my dad could be pretty intense at times. I wonder where I get it from?

As I grew up (well, not so much but you know what I mean) through the years, Alice always seemed to be a trusty companion. I became a guest in Alice’s various worlds as a way to get lost and get away from the outside “real” world that was such a fucking hassle. While kids were out there being mean, partying, bullying, and being cool, I wanted no part of it and chose to escape (pun intended) it all. Through Alice’s albums I could find myself living in a nightmare, being an outlaw on the run, or even living in a political world where the only party that mattered was the “wild” party. Actually, I have an even better example of how Alice really struck a chord with me.

I had been having a shitty day at school (surprise). I was in 10th grade, new to town, and no friends (I would later have 3). I felt so lame. I showed up for school in my jeans, a Cinderella t-shirt, and my frumpy fat face. Right off the bat a few kids made fun of me and I just remember thinking to myself, “You just gotta get through 3 years of this and you’ll be free.” I went home that day and I put on Alice Cooper’s “Teenage Lament ’74.” I can remember having the headphones on and having tears streaming down my face. The lyrics (for the most part, my dad never cheated on my mom with a secretary) just hit me and all of the sudden I felt understood. Again, that’s pretty powerful stuff.

Even through my adult years as life just seemed to get better, Alice was always around. I never seemed to have to wait very long to see an Alice Cooper show. An Alice Cooper live show was (and still is) an unforgettable, fun experience. In all honesty, Alice was (and again, still is) one of the few acts who’s music is as mesmerizing and mind blowing as his over the top visually stunning live performances. Since 1990 I have seen 9 Alice Cooper shows. My 9th show was here in Atlanta where he mopped the stage with Motley Crue but I’ll digress. Every time I would see Alice live, I would go home and wish that I could have the opportunity to meet this man and thank him for all the years of timeless music that got me through some rough years. Well, this year, thanks to a dear friend, I had that opportunity.

After Alice’s show here in Atlanta on August 30th, my wife and I got in line with a handful of others to go backstage and meet Alice Cooper. I stood there in silence trying to figure out just what I was going to say to Alice Cooper. You know that scene in the Godfather where Luca Brasi is rehearsing what to say to the Godfather? “Godfather, I am honored and grateful that you have invited me to your home today on the day of your daughter’s wedding…” That was me. “Alice, it’s such an honor to meet you.” “Alice, thank you for…” then all of the sudden it was my turn.

As I approached him, Alice reached his hand out and said, “And what’s your name?” “Don…” Alice then laughs and goes, “It’s ok. Breathe.” I just let out a laugh and I said, “Alice, thank you so much for all the music. I’m sure you’ve heard this a lot but your music really got me through a pretty rough childhood.” He smiled and said, “Don, thank you for saying that. Let’s take some pictures and I’ll sign your albums. Oh wow, you still have all the inserts!” I was so speechless and if you know me you’ll know that me being speechless is a very rare moment.

I consider myself to be a really lucky guy. Over the years I have had some amazing opportunities to interview and hang out with some of my all time favorite hard rock/metal bands but having the opportunity to have 5 minutes with Alice Cooper is something that I will never forget. Getting the chance to thank him for all the years of music that continues to be a huge part of my life and to see his reaction to those words will last me a lifetime. Now if I could just get Alice to do an interview with me for the blog. Hey, a boy can continue to dream can’t he?

donandalice
The Brainfart & The Nightmare Himself: Alice Cooper!

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