Masters of Metal Volume 2
Label: K-Tel
Release Date: 1984
The Artwork:
1/5
Ok, so this one gets a 1/5 of lack of originality. It’s the exact same artwork as Volume 1 only instead of being blue, it’s RED and it has “Volume 2” on the top of the cover. Lame as fuck! Nothing much else to really say about this one.
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SIDE 1:
Iron Maiden – Run to the Hills (5/5)
It’s fucking Iron Maiden. How can you go wrong? Opening things with “Run to the Hills” is just a great way to kick things off. At this time, I was already familiar with this song but hey, can you ever have too many albums with Iron Maiden on it? So far this compilation is off to a kickin’ start.
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Helix – Heavy Metal Love (1/5)
What the fuck is this crap? Good god almighty. This has to be Canada’s worst export since that shitty ass Molson beer. I mean, for some reason, whenever I think of “Helix” I think of those plastic protractors I had to have for geometry in elementary school. I thought Helix back then was lame as fuck and time hasn’t done much to make them sound any better.
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Triumph – Never Surrender (3/5)
Ok, so a band from Canada that’s not Rush and that doesn’t suck like Helix. For some reason, Triumph always showed up on these compilation albums. It’s almost like they figured out that the only way kids would ever really hear Triumph was by putting them on these compilations. This is a pretty cool song but kind of weird. It’s definitely not as cool as “Lay It on the Line” but it’s a pretty chill jam. Not bad at all.
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Anvil – Metal on Metal (4/5)
Man, fucking Anvil. The first time I ever heard them was on this compilation and I loved it right away and went out and bought the album. These guys might not be known for their awesome songwriting but this song always has and always will kick fucking ass. As a matter of fact, paying to see these guys do this song live is worth the price of admission alone. Don’t get me wrong, they had some other pretty rad ass songs but this song will always be their signature. Great fucking tune.
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Accept – Balls to the Wall (5/5)
Another first for me. The first time I heard “Balls to the Wall” was on this compilation and of course the 12 year old me just thought it was hilarious that they were saying “balls.” I couldn’t understand a fucking word the dude was saying but I just knew that I fucking loved it. I didn’t really go out and buy this album until a few years later but I used to jam this song all the fucking time. Still sounds amazing!
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Urgent – You’re Not the One (0/5)
Holy crap this is terrible. I must have totally blocked out this band as I didn’t even remember ever hearing them. Once the singing started I suddenly realized why I blocked this shit out. It sucks. At first, I thought this was going to be Argent. You know, the band that KISS stole “God Gave Rock N Roll To You II” from? Anyways, that probably would’ve been way better than this crapolla.
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SIDE 2
Quiet Riot – Cum On Feel the Noize (5/5)
Much like the Iron Maiden song, this was a song I was already familiar with but still loved. Even all these years later, this song still kicks ass and I’d much rather hear this one than the lousy Slade version. Fortunately, this compilation didn’t have any Slade on it so at least I was spared that.
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Judas Priest – You’ve Got Another Thing Comin’ (5/5)
Seriously? How can you fucking go wrong with this one? I mean, especially back in 1984 when these songs were at their peak and were big hits, it was cool to have a few great songs on one compilation. This song never died, never got old, and no matter how many times I hear it I still bang my head and sing along like I did all those years ago. It’s a truly timeless song that just gets better with age.
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Rush – Limelight (4/5)
Rush is another band that occasionally popped up on these compilation albums. At the time, I was really just hearing Rush for the first time. “Distant Early Warning” definitely made a bigger impact on me than this one did and even now this isn’t one of my favorite Rush songs. It’s still a great song nonetheless and no matter how many times I hear it I never skip it.
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Lee Aaron – Shake it Up (0/5)
Good fucking lord this is almost as bad as the fucking Helix song. I never heard of her before this album and even back then I thought she sounded really stupid. She was hotter than all hell without a doubt but this song was just so stupid. “Shake it up, move your feet. Shake it up, feel the beat.” The only thing I feel right now is nauseous.
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Coney Hatch – Hey Operator (0/5)
Where the fuck do they find these bands? Seriously. I don’t even remember this song from having this album back in the day. These guys are the fucking worse. It’s like, Foreigner but way worse. I know that sounds impossible but trust me on this one. “Hey operator, make the telephone talk to me.” Man, I’m just hanging up on this shit. Go away.
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Fist – Thunder in Rock (1/5)
This is one of those moments where I can’t really tell if I actually like this band or not. This is probably one of those situations where they didn’t necessarily pick the best song to represent a band on this compilation. There’s a sax solo in this song which is totally NOT metal and honestly, the more the song played on, the less I liked it. It started out a 3/5 but by the end it was 1/5. Totally annoying song.
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Santers – All Right Now (0/5)
Again, where the fuck did they find these fucking bands? Oh wait, CANADA. Yup, this is a Canadian trio doing a really boring, dull, lackluster note for note cover of the Free classic “All Right Now.” I couldn’t even make it through this song. I couldn’t hit the stop button fast enough. Terrible.
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